When children see their parents and other trusted adults performing activities, it is natural for them to show interest and want to “help”. This usually means the activity must slow down and progress be forfeited to some degree.  For the parents and adults who slow down and allow the child to experience the activity, you are building trust, strengthening bonds, and inspiring learning and respect with the child. The experiences a child has will impact their life.

It can be challenging for adults to halt progress and work, especially when there are deadlines, expectations and safety concerns. If this is the case, acknowledge the child’s interest and feelings. Explain to the child what is happening during the activity. Try to find a few minutes, maybe during a break (water or lunch), to allow the child to experience part of the activity. For example, you may not allow the child to use an electric drill, but you can remove the drill bit and allow the child to hold it in their hand to feel how heavy it is.

My parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles allowed my brothers and me to participate in many ‘grown up’ activities. They modified experiences to be safe and reasonable. Of course, many of those activities became chores when we got older, but we were competent and confident. Competence and confidence are skills children use to achieve life successes in relationships, learning, and living.

Were you a “helper” as a child? How do you encourage children?