One evening, after dinner, mom told my brothers and me to clean up and wash the dishes. Of course we bickered back and forth, arguing over who would wash, rinse, dry and put away. Somehow we figured it out (my older brother probably assigned the duties). I remember watching soap being squeezed into the filling sink, bubbles rising high, and my brother taking a handful and blowing the bubbles. It looked so cool and I wanted to do it too! I believe we used up all the bubbles this way leaving a sink of warm soap clouded water, and instead of getting to work on the dishes, we made more bubbles by squeezing a huge amount of liquid soap into the already soapy water. On went the tap and a mountain of bubbles began to form again. Higher the bubbles climbed, covering the faucet, and then… the water spilled over the sink and onto the floor carrying bubbles with it. A mixture of surprise, fear and excitement froze us. The tap was turned off and we stared at the water on the floor. I stepped closer to the sink and slipped a little, catching hold of the counter to stay upright. My feet tingled and I thought, “That was fun!” Then began the slip and slide portion of the evening dishwashing. Soon, the water on the floor had spread out and it wasn’t slippery anymore. What to do…what to do? Someone had the bright idea (we are all wonderful problem solvers) to squeeze the liquid soap directly onto the damp linoleum. Yep, that worked. It’s amazing how the addition of a little extra liquid soap will turn up the volume of children’s voices to an octave parents cannot ignore. Squealing, screeching, and laughing so hard, we couldn’t catch our breaths. We glided, tumbled, and collided with  the walls, the floor, each other, and the appliances. Doing the dishes was fun! Then mom walked in. I remember trying convince her of my innocence…that this was just an accident. She wasn’t buying it, but would be buying more soap because we had squeezed the container empty. There was cleaning up to do and we weren’t getting out of it, but now we had a project manager with efficiency and discipline on her mind.

Young children learn skills by observing their surroundings and mimicking parents, caregivers and siblings. A toddler may reach for a parent’s phone or move a broom back and forth in an effort to mimic their parent. In the area of household chores, it is useful and healthy to involve your child. By allowing your child to participate you are not only teaching valuable skills such as math, language, problem solving and physical, but also spending one on one time with them, supporting their social emotional development. A child who spends time with their parent during chores, may associate those positive experiences with chores as they get older. This means a parent may have more cooperation with household chores as children enter adolescence, and less need to use, “Because I said so”. Children also develop responsibility skills when completing chores, and this is something your child’s teachers will thank you for later, as homework becomes a regular chore.

It’s never too early to involve your child in the household chores. With infants you may hand them a sock to hold and explore as you sort and fold the laundry. Talk to them and explain what you are doing. Toddlers and preschoolers can help sort clothes, put them into the washer or dryer, and begin to identify their clothes. You can point out size differences, colors, and textures. When your child indicates a desire to vacuum, even if they are just practicing with the vacuum off, let them try it out. The experience may pay off later, as you enjoy clean carpets vacuumed by your teen.

It is important to remember that children may not ‘get it right’ often, or may need reminders. Of course, supervision is key. I know that prior to the soap bubble extravaganza of 1983 my brothers and I had successfully done the dishes a few times. So, mom must have felt comfortable leaving us to the task…but kids will be kids, right?

Growing up, songs and finger plays were threaded throughout my learning experiences. One I remember vividly, Mairzy Doats, was the highlight song of my fourth grade year. The song has an elastic quality to it as it is sung, and you can’t help but move to the tune. When I became a preschool teacher I was reintroduced to many of my favorite childhood songs, and learned some new favorites. That was almost 20 years ago, and some of those songs have stuck with me. I continue to use them professionally, because why mess with what works? Here is a list of my top 10 favorite songs and finger plays.

Open Shut Them

Skidamarink

Twinkle Little Star

Row, Row, Row Your Boat

Where is Thumbkin

Hickory Dickory Dock

There Were Ten In The Bed

Three Little Fishies

A Tisket A Tasket

Mr. Sun

I often choose to modify songs to fit the needs of the children. For example, I integrate children’s names into songs to heighten their attention and connection, or change some of the words to fit an experience. Singing songs is a great way to ease transitions for children (bedtime, hand washing, diaper changing, good byes, chores). When I need a break from singing, I use recorded songs by Ella Jenkins, Raffi, and Greg and Steve, or I will use instrumental music like big band, jazz, and classical. Whether singing with children or interacting with them during recorded music, it is the time with the parent or caregiver and other children that makes the difference for a child.

What was your favorite song as a child?

Imagination and pretend play go hand in hand. As a child I pretended and imagined like it was going out of style, much to the frustration of my elementary school teachers. I loved to dress up, act out scenarios, day dream about almost anything, and sometimes let those ideas get the best of me. Around the age of 8 or 9 I was introduced to scary TV programs (Tales from the Darkside, Fright Night, and The Twilight Zone). I was drawn to them, had to watch them, and then scared sleepless. My brothers laugh about watching me begin my long jump training at such a young age. We lived in a house where our three bedrooms faced a landing at the top of the stairs and we could see each other’s rooms. Dressed in  a long nightgown, prickly with static cling, I would stand at the doorway of my older brother’s room and begin the short run to my bedroom. As I passed my younger brother’s doorway my steps quickened, and as I stepped through my own doorway liftoff would occur, and I’d land safely on my bed. Immediately following the landing, covers would be pulled over my shoulders and an army of stuffed animals would be put in place around my neck (this would stop any vampire, of course). My main concern, vampires were secondary, was the little white monster under the bed. Luckily he never got me…

As we got a little older my brothers and I would play games together, one being war. At the time, our experiences were limited to television shows and stories from our uncles. One of the homes we lived in was in a rural area of southern Texas. It was surrounded by grapefruit and orange orchards, and not far away, a huge overgrown piece of land. The grass was so high you could be completely covered just by crouching down a little. We often used our fingers for guns and “Bang!!” to announce that we were shooting each other. Some how I was never able to shoot my older brother, no matter how close I was…he would say, “You missed me” and of course I believed him.

As my brothers and I got older, our pretend play dwindled and our creativity took new forms (we all draw and create things). One thing that never dwindled was the teasing I got from my brothers, especially about my nighttime long jump practices. I could never tease them enough to frustrate them, as they did me, so I had to use my imagination and come up with something else.

One Saturday morning, a couple of years later, my mom told me to get my younger brother up. It was still pretty dark in his room, I opened the door, called his name and told him mom wanted him to get up. Ten minutes later, he was still snuggled in bed. I slowly opened the door, crawled in and under his bed. I stayed there a minute, slowed my breathing, then reached up and gently grabbed hold of the corner of the sheet. I whispered his name and slightly tugged on the sheet. He rolled over, pulling the sheet with him. I took hold of the comforter and tugged on it as I slowly said his name in a raspy, high pitched voice. He stirred again, seeming to gain some consciousness. I tugged the comforter again and could tell that he had woken but was unsure what was going on. I took a breath, firmly pulled the comforter and loudly screeched his name as creepily as I could. He shrieked and jumped from his bed to the door, fumbled with the handle, then bolted up the stairs hollering all the way. Finally, a little payback.

Pretending is a way children make sense of their world and work out stressful situations. Imagination and creativity help adults relieve stress and reenergize (getting lost in a book, planning a trip, rearranging furniture). What are some ways you used imagination as a child? How do you use imagination now?

This week I volunteered to be an observer for a Guinness World Record event. The company my friend works for was attempting to set the world record for “The Largest Simultaneous Financial Literacy Lesson in Multiple Locations”. They were successful and a new world record and category will now be a part of the Guinness Book of World Records. My role was simple, observe the lessons, count the number of children and facilitators, document the start time, take some video and then ‘facetime’ with a Guinness representative. After the classroom lesson, volunteers and facilitators were invited to join recess and lunch with the kids. During recess I chatted with two 5th grade girls about their experience during the lesson. When asked, “What did you think about the lesson today?” one girl replied, “Good”. With that response, I knew I was going to have to employ more skills. I smiled, agreed, and joked a little. Once the girls smiled and began laughing, that’s when I asked the second question, “So, what was good about the lesson?” Sneaky, right? The second girl said, “The part about how to save money, why it’s important.” and the first girl added, “Yeah, and ideas of how to make money. You can’t save it if you don’t have any.” Brilliant. I then asked, “Was there an idea you liked best?” She answered, “Yeah, I’m going to start a lemonade stand.”

This experience got me thinking about how I earned and saved money as a child. The old standby, the Tooth Fairy, came through regularly the first few years of school. For some reason, I had to put the tooth in a small glass of water beside the bed, not under the pillow as the story books suggest (I understand why, now). Then, in the morning, there would be a nickel or a dime in the water. I even think I got a quarter once! When we moved to Kansas, I was eight, my dad promised to give me money if I would help move things and stop running around like a monkey. A few hours later, he gave me a dime, and I was excited! I could buy at least a few pieces of candy with that. I received money sometimes at Christmas and also for birthdays. When I completed a babysitting course at the local hospital, at 13, I became excited at the prospect of really earning money.

Saving money was not new to me as a child. I heard my parents and family members talk of saving money often, and my parents had set up savings accounts for my brothers and me. But, as a kid, I still needed my parents to tell me when to put money into the savings account.

It’s never too early to start educating children and familiarizing them with money and saving. It is also never too late to begin educating an individual about financial matters. Exposure and education are key.

What were your early experiences with money as a child?

It’s time to get the garden prepped for Fall planting. I look forward to watching plants grow and begin producing all kinds of edible gifts. Growing up, gardens were a staple, no matter where we lived. Some of our gardens were small and some weren’t. As a kid, I liked the small gardens because there was less work for me to do (I despise weeding), but the large gardens were fun to hide in. There are two early memories of our gardens in Louisiana that stand out in my mind. The first was when my whole family gathered buckets and shovels to harvest potatoes. Mom and dad would drive the shovels deep into the soil and overturn a big mound of dirt. It was like a game, did you have a dirt clod, or was it a POTATO (eyes wide, fingers tingling)? We played this game for what seemed like forever, I think I was maybe four or five. Then just before we started back to the house, dad took out his pocket knife and sliced one of the smaller potatoes. He bit into one and gave a slice to me. I bit into it. It was hard and crunchy, and I remember not particularly enjoying that bite. To this day, however, I occasionally will nibble on a piece of raw potato during preparations for dinner, and remember that time in the garden.

Taste development in children starts early. Infants are wired to understand their world by putting objects in their mouths. This also begins providing them lots of opportunities to experience different tastes. However, just because your infant reaches for the soda can you are drinking doesn’t mean that you have to give it to them or that they even want what’s inside. The child learns from watching you and wants to mimic your actions. If you really want to meet their need in that moment, you might consider offering them an unopened can.

You can encourage and support an infant or young child’s taste development by offering new foods in small quantities. For example, when an infant is ready to begin eating baby food (according to the pediatrician), a parent or caregiver can place a teaspoon or two of baby food onto a high chair tray. The infant will explore the new substance with their hands, eyes, mouth…hair, ears, eyes…It’s going to be messy, but a wonderful food experience for your child. Tip: to help with clean up, take the child’s clothing off prior to the food experience; after the experience place a wet washcloth on the tray and let the infant explore that. As they manipulate the washcloth, the water will be loosening any dried baby food.

The second memory that I think back on often is one with my younger brother. In one of our gardens we grew a few rows of corn. When the corn silk began to develop, my brother would gently stroke the various colors of the corn silk and smile at them. He was just a toddler at the time, but mom called them his girlfriends, and the term stuck. My older brother and I would giggle at how silly we thought this all was. Young children have a strong aptitude for imagination, and whether or not my younger brother actually pretended the ears of corn were his girlfriends, the experience fueled my own imagination.

Recently, I visited my younger brother and his young family. He showed me the updates to his various projects, one of which is a Desert Corn Project in its second year. I was impressed with his patience and skill, and complemented him. Then I noticed the shining corn silk on the young ears of corn. We had a good laugh reminiscing about his old ‘girlfriends’.

Do you have a favorite flavor from childhood, a suggestion about how to introduce new foods to young children, or a memory of how imagination impacted you?

My three-year-old niece and I were walking to the park a couple of weeks ago. It was damp and muggy outside from an earlier rain, and there were puddles of water scattered along the sidewalk. My niece immediately was drawn to each puddle and had to hop in every one, instructing me to do so as well. She then pointed out our footprints and smiled. Lucky for us the last thing my sister-in-law said as we left was, “Go have fun and get dirty!”

Water is amazing. It is essential to life and magical to the imagination. Infants and toddlers delight in water play, whether in the bath or in a sippy cup turned upside down-dripping. Water is, in my opinion, the most enjoyable and abundant play material available. Dip an old paint brush in to a cup of water and a child can paint the sidewalk, house, plants, toys, themselves, paper. Just wait a little while and it has all dried up. Dip a cup or spoon into a bucket of water and a child will explore balance, measurement, sound, and weight. Add toys, baby dolls, wash cloth and a drop or two of dish soap or baby wash and you will have a busy and attentive child- just don’t go overboard and add too many items at once. During this play a parent or caregiver is free to join in or simply talk about what the child is doing and ask questions. For example, “You are washing the doll’s face, eyes, ears…what other parts of the doll will you wash? You are washing the doll just like I help you when it’s bath time.” Pause during this type of conversation. Allow your child to answer or respond in their own way; it may be a look or smile. Children enjoy water and should be encouraged to explore it safely.

Water is not only for getting clean, it is also for getting dirty. Beginning my childhood in rural Louisiana, I was exposed to the wonderful elements of nature. My favorite: Mud! I remember once, after a particularly strong storm, watching the water run down our dirt drive out to the pasture. It was moving so swiftly and I was mesmerized by the shining brown water that looked a lot like chocolate milk. Once the rain stopped, my brothers and I went outside and explored the running water mixed with sand and clay. I’m sure mom told us not to get too dirty, but… My most vivid memory of that day was starting at the top of the sloping dirt driveway and slipping all the way down past the house. It was bumpy, it was slippery, it was wet, it was mud! Later, mom rinsed us off with the garden hose and we dried off shivering and giggling.

What are your favorite memories of water?

Midafternoon hits and I’m tired, so tired that I contemplate a nap. I push through, however, and get a second wind- look out laundry, here I come! This doesn’t happen everyday, but when it does I remember a story my mother told me. After my first day of kindergarten, I arrived home in tears. Mom, concerned, hugged me and asked what was the matter. Crying, I said, “Mama, I’m so tired…(sob) I just want to go to bed!” Daily naps were a part of the routine in my home, and also in my kindergarten classroom. Maybe because of the excitement of the first day of school, the other kids or the two inches of cushion separating me from that hard floor (I still remember the smell of that vinyl mat…), I didn’t nap that day. One thing was certain, though, my five year old self was in desperate need of some sleep.

Studies on the importance of sleep have been done and re-done. It seems that, at times, we are obsessed with sleep or the lack of it. And, maybe we should be….Not everyone requires the same amount of sleep but infants and young children require more than adults, and quality sleep is necessary for brain development. So, how do we get that quality sleep? A routine can help establish healthy patterns of sleep for children (and adults). The routine may begin with the evening meal, and continue through clean up, bath time, tooth brushing, stories or lullabies and finish with a snuggle. Whatever routine you have with your child should be individualized. Not every child calms with a book or bath. Keeping a routine consistent for at least two weeks will give you an idea of what may or may not work.

During my time as a preschool teacher, I cherished nap time. No, I didn’t nap, but the children did. The soft sounds of breathing, and sometimes snoring, were comforting and soothing. Nap time gave my co-teachers and me a chance to rest our own bodies and recharge our minds. Well, rest is a generous word for a preschool teacher during nap time, but we weren’t moving as much or as quickly as when the children were awake. From my own observations, the children who napped generally smiled more, cried less, and recovered from upset faster than the few who didn’t nap (there was always one or two).

What are you like when you’ve had enough rest or sleep? Do you smile more, cry less and recover from upset quickly? Are you more productive?

Most of the childhood experiences I cherish most are those made with my two brothers. Last week, I was wrapping a gift and as I pressed down on the tape to make it less visible, I remembered looking at a similar wrapped gift under the tree before Christmas, many years ago. I was probably 12 years old, and my older brother was giving me instructions on how to open a present using a paring knife and then re-taping the gift so that it looked undisturbed. I remember feeling  excited because waiting for Christmas morning was no longer necessary. I also remember feeling a little guilty, but the impulse was too great to hold back. Ok, the impulse wasn’t too great for my 12 year old self, I really just wanted to be cool like my brother.

Impulse control is one skill that takes years of practice for many of us. It begins in early childhood with the development of self-regulation skills. Children often learn, memorize and can repeat rules when asked. Knowing the rules plays a small part in the action of following the rules. Impulsive actions in children are normal. How you respond to your child in those moments can make a difference. Help your child by offering frequent reminders, and understand that a reminder before school will not last your child all day. It may also be helpful to work with your child’s teacher or caregiver to develop a consistent approach. Children who are able to manage their emotions have greater success in school and as adults. Managing emotions does not mean that a child is always happy or calm, and it is unfair of adults to expect this of children. Parents are a child’s first and most important teacher. Siblings come in a close second.

I have learned many things from my older brother, not all involved sharp objects and making as little sound as possible. He has been a great role model for ‘hard work pays off’, the ultimate in delaying gratification.